Religious Orders

Five Guys WTF?

Posted: Wednesday June 10 2009 @ 2:39pm

Religious Order: Food

Williamsburg recent obtained its own Five Guys hamburger joint. So, we tried it out.

Horrible! Why would anyone eat there? The hamburgers are greasy and are on soft white buns that make each bite wad up in your mouth like a soiled diaper. (Not that I've ever had a wad of soiled diaper in my mouth. Ewww!)

The fries are horrible, a fetid combination of burned exteriors and underdone interiors. They're all smashed into a cup to ensure that they get soggy from the trapped steam.

The only tasty thing in the building are the peanuts. Yes, they have big boxes of peanuts-in-the-shell. You can eat as many as you want. You'll want a lot because nothing else is edible.

Unfortunately, someone decided that the optimum location for this box of edibles was on top of the garbage can. Health code FAIL!

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