And, let us not forget that Cresco is the Birthplace of Genius.
The 1109 words/phrases you can't say in a text message in Pakistan:
Anal, Anal Annie, Anal Sex, Analannie, Analsex, Anus, Arse, Ass, Ass Bagger, Ass Blaster, Ass Clown, Ass Cowboy, Ass Fuck, Ass Fucker, Ass Hole, Ass Holes, Ass Hore, Ass Jockey, Ass Kiss, Ass Kisser, Ass Klown, Ass Lick, Ass Licker, Ass Lover, Ass Man, Ass Monkey, Ass Munch, Ass Muncher, Ass Packer, Ass Pirate, Ass Puppies, Ass Ranger, Ass Whore, Ass Wipe, Assbagger, Assblaster, Assclown, Asscowboy, Assfuck, Assfucker, Asshole, Assholes, Asshore, Assjockey, Asskiss, Asskisser, Assklown, Asslick, Asslicker, Asslover, Assman, Assmonkey, Assmunch, Assmuncher, Asspacker, Asspira Te, Asspuppies, Assranger, Asswhore, Asswipe, Athletes Foot, Athletesfoot, Axing The Weasel, B Hard, Back Door, Back Door Man, Backdoor, Backdoorman, Backsea T, Bad Ass, Bad Fuck, Badfuck, Ball Licker, Ball Sack, Balllicker, Ballsack, Banging, Barely Legal, Barelylegal, Barf, Barf Face, Barface, Barfface, Bastard, Bazongas, Bazooms, Beastality, Beastiality, Beat Off, Beat Your Meat, Beatoff, Bea T-Off, Bea Tyourmea T, Bi Sexual, Bia Tch, Big Ass, Big Bitch, Big Bitch, Big Butt, Bigass, Bigbastard, Bigbutt, Bisexual, Bi-Sexual, Bitch, Bitches, Bitchin, Bitchy, Bite Me, Biteme, Black Out, Blackout, Blow Job, Blowjob, Boner, Boobies, Boobs, Boody, Breast, Breast Job, Breast Lover, Breast Man, Breastjob, Breastlover, Breastman, Budweiser, Bull Crap, Bull Dike, Bull Dyke, Bull Shit, Bullcrap, Bulldike, Bulldyke, Bullshit, Bumble Fuck, Bumblefuck, Bumfuck, Bunghole, Butch Babes, Butch Dike, Butch Dyke, Butchbabes, Butchdike, Butchdyke, Butt Bang, Butt Fuck, Butt Fucker, Butt Fuckers, Butt Head, Butt Man, Butt Plug, Butt Stain, Buttbang, Butt-Bang, Buttface, Buttfuck, Butt-Fuck, Buttfucker, Butt-Fucker, Buttfuckers, Butt-Fuckers, Butthead, Buttman, Buttpira Te, Buttplug, Buttstain, Camel Toe, Cameltoe, Carpet Muncher, Carpetmuncher, Carruth, Cherry Popper, Cherrypopper, Chick Slick, Chickslick, Clam Digger, Clam Diver, Clamdigger, Clamdiver, Clit, Clitoris, Cock, Cock Block, Cock Blocker, Cock Cowboy, Cock Fight, Cock Knob, Cock Licker, Cock Lover, Cock Nob, Cock Queen, Cock Rider, Cock Smith, Cock Sucker, Cock Tail, Cock Tease, Cockblock, Cockblocker, Cockcowboy, Cockfight, Cockhead, Cockknob, Cocklicker, Cocklover, Cocknob, Cockqueen, Cockrider, Cocks Man, Cocksman, Cocksmith, Cocksucer, Cocksucker, Cocktail, Cocktease, Cocky, Condom, Copula Te, Corn Hole, Cornhole, Crack Pipe, Crack Whore, Crackpipe, Crackwhore, Crack-Whore, Crap, Crappy, Creamy, Crotch, Crotch Jockey, Crotch Monkey, Crotch Rot, Crotchjockey, Crotchmonkey, Crotchrot, Cum, Cum Bubble, Cum Fest, Cum Jockey, Cum Quat, Cum Queen, Cum Shot, Cumbubble, Cumfest, Cumjockey, Cumm, Cumming, Cumqua T, Cumqueen, Cumshot, Cunnilingus, Cunt, Cunt Fuck, Cunt Fucker, Cunt Licker, Cuntfuck, Cuntfucker, Cuntlicker, Cyber Sex, Cyber Slimer, Cybersex, Cyberslimer, Dahmer, Damn, Damn It, Damnit, Da Tnigga, Deap Throat, Deaper, Deapthroat, Deep Throat, Deeper, Deepthroat, Defeca Te, Deposit, Devil, Dick Brain, Dick Fart, Dick For Brains, Dick Head, Dick Lick, Dick Licker, Dick Likcer, Dick Wad, Dick Weed, Dickbrain, Dickforbrains, Dickhead, Dickless, Dicklick, Dicklicker, Dickman, Dickwad, Dickweed, Dike, Dildo, Dip Stick, Dipstick, Dirty Ho, Dixie Dike, Dixie Dyke, Dixiedike, Dixiedyke, Do Me, Doggie Style, Doggiestyle, Doggy Stlye, Doggystyle, Dome, Dong, Dope, Drag Queen, Dragqueen, Dragqween, Drip Dick, Dripdick, Drunk, Drunken, Dumb Ass, Dumb Bitch, Dumb Fuck, Dumbass, Dumbbitch, Dumbfuck, Easy Slut, Easyslut, Eat Me, Eat Pussy, Ea Tballs, Ea Tme, Ea Tpussy, Ejaculate, Erection, Evl, Excrement, Face Fucker, Facefucker, Faggot, Fagot, Fairy, Fanny Fucker, Fannyfucker, Fart, Fast Fuck, Fastfuck, Fat Ass, Fat Fuck, Fat Fucker, Fatass, Fatfuck, Fatfucker, Fatso, Fella Tio, Femme, Finger Food, Finger Fuck, Finger Fucker, Fingerfood, Fingerfuck, Fingerfucker, Fist Fuck, Fist Fucker, Fistfuck, Fistfucker, Fisting, Flasher, Fla Tulence, Floggin The Dolphin, Fondle, Foot Fuck, Foot Fucker, Foot Licker, Footaction, Footfuck, Footfucker, Footlicker, Footstar, Fore Skin, Foreskin, Fornica Te, Four 20, Four Twenty, Four20, Fourtwenty, Freak Fuck, Freakfuck, Freaky Fucker, Freakyfucker, Free Fuck, Freefuck, Fuck, Fuck Bag, Fuck Buddy, Fuck Face, Fuck Fest, Fuck Freak, Fuck Friend, Fuck Head, Fuck Her, Fuck It, Fuck Knob, Fuck Me, Fuck Me Hard, Fuck Monkey, Fuck Off, Fuck Pig, Fuck Them, Fuck Whore, Fuck You, Fucka, Fuckable, Fuckbag, Fuckbuddy, Fucked, Fucked Up, Fuckedup, Fucker, Fuckers, Fuckface, Fuckfest, Fuckfreak, Fuckfriend, Fuckhead, Fuckher, Fuckin, Fuckin A, Fuckin Nuts, Fuckin Right, Fuckina, Fucking, Fucking A, Fucking Bitch, Fucking Nuts, Fuckingbitch, Fuckinnuts, Fuckinright, Fuckit, Fuckknob, Fuckme, Fuckmehard, Fuckmonkey, Fuckoff, Fuckpig, Fuckwhore, Fuckyou, Fudge Pakcers, Fun Fuck, Funfuck, Fuuck, G Unit, Gang Bang, Gang Banger, Gangbang, Gangbanger, Gay, Gay Ass, Gay Mutha Fuckin Queer, Gay Pride, Gaymuthafuckinwhore, Genital, Get It On, Getiton, Giehn, Give Head, Givehead, Glazed Donut, Glazeddonut, Go To Hell, God Damed Mutha Fucka, God Damit, God Damn, God Damned, God Manit, Goddamit, Goddamn, Goddamned, Goddamnes, Goddamnit, Goddamnmuthafucker, Gonorrehea, Gonzagas, Gook, Got Jesus, Got2ha Veit, Gotohell, G-Unit, Hand Job, Handjob, Hard On, Harder, Hardon, Harem, He Hate Me, Head Fuck, Head Lights, Headfuck, Headlights, Hehateme, Hell No, Hell Yes, Hellno, Hell Yes, Hen House, Henhouse, Herpes, Hershey Hi Way, Hersheyhighway, Hersheyhiway, Hershy High Way, Ho Mo, Hobo, Hole, Hole Stuffer, Holestuffer, Homo, Homo Bangers, Homo Sexual, Homobangers, Homosexual, Honkers, Honkey, Hooker, Hookers, Hooters, Hore, Horney, Horny, Horseshit, Hose Job, Hosejob, Hoser, Hostage, Hot Damn, Hot Pussy, Hot To Trot, Hot2trot, Hotdamn, Hotpussy, Hottotrot, Hussy, Hustler, Id10t, Idiot, Idoit, In The Ass, In The Buff, Ingin, Insest, Inter Course, Inter Racial, Intercourse, Interracial, Intheass, Inthebuff, Jack The Ripper, Jackass, Jackoff, Jacktheripper, Jap, Jap Crap, Japcrap, Jerk Off, Jerkoff, Jesus Chirst, Jesuschrist, Jism, Jiz, Jiz Juice, Jizim, Jizjuice, Jizz, Jizzim, Joint, Juggalo, Jugs, K Mart, Kill, Killer, Killing, Kiss Ass, Kissass, Kkk, Kmart, Knockers, Koon, Kotex, Krap, Krappy, Kum, Kum Bubble, Kum Quat, Kumbubble, Kumbullbe, Kumqua T, Kunt, Ky, Ky Jelly, Lactate, Lady Boog, Laid, Lap Dance, Lapdance, Lesbain, Lesbayn, Lesbian, Lesbin, Lesbo, Lez, Lez Be, Lez Be Friends, Lezbe, Lezbefriends, Lezbo, Lezz, Lezzo, Lick Me, Licker, Lickme, Limp Dick, Limpdick, Limy, Live Sex, Livesex, Lolita, Looser, Lotion, Love Bone, Love Goo, Love Gun, Love Juice, Love Muscle, Love Pistol, Love Rocket, Lovebone, Lovegoo, Lovegun, Lovejuice, Lovemuscle, Lovepistol, Loverocket, Low Life, Lowlife, Lube Job, Lubejob, Lucky Camel Toe, Luckycammeltoe, Mams, Man Hater, Man Paste, Manha Ter, Manpaste, Mary Jane, Maryjane, Mastabate, Mastabater, Master Blaster, Masterba Te, Masterblaster, Mastrabator, Mattress Princess, Ma Ttressprincess, Meat Beatter, Mea Tbea Tter, Molest, Molester, Molestor, Money Shot, Moneyshot, Mother Fucker, Mother Love Bone, Motherfuck, Motherfucker, Motherlovebone, Muff, Muff Dive, Muff Diver, Muff Licker, Muffdive, Muffdiver, Muffin Diver, Muffindiver, Mufflikcer, Murder, Mutha Fucker, Naked, Nasty Bitch, Nasty Ho, Nasty Slut, Nasty Whore, Nastybitch, Nastyho, Nastyslut, Nastywhore, Neon Deon, Nig, Niger, Nigga, Nigger, Nipple, Nipple Ring, Nipplering, Nit Tit, Nittit, No Fucking Way, No Sex, Nofuckingway, Nookie, Nooner, Nude, Nut Fucker, Nutfucker, Oicu812, On The Rag, Ontherag, Orgasm, Orgy, Ou812, Oui, Pimp, Pearl Necklace, Pearlnecklace, Pecker, Pee, Peep Show, Peepshow, Peepshpw, Penetration, Penis, Penthouse, Period, Phque, Pimp, Pimp Simp, Pimped, Pimper, Pimpjuic, Pimpjuice, Pimpsimp, Piss, Piss Head, Pissed, Pisser, Pisshead, Play Boy, Play Girl, Playboy, Playgirl, Pocket Pool, Pocketpool, Polack, Poon Tang, Poontang, Poop, Pooper, Poor White Trash, Poorwhitetrash, Popimp, Porch Monkey, Porchmonkey, Porn, Porn Flick, Porn King, Porn Princess, Pornflick, Pornking, Porno, Pornprincess, Prema Ture, Prick, Prick Head, Prickhead, Primetime, Prostitute, Pubic, Pubic Lice, Pubiclice, Pud, Pud Boy, Pudboy, Pudd, Pudd Boy, Puddboy, Pun Tang, Puntang, Purina Princess, Purinapricness, Pussy, Pussy Cat, Pussy Eater, Pussy Fucker, Pussy Licker, Pussy Lips, Pussy Lover, Pussy Pounder, Pussyca T, Pussyea Ter, Pussyfucker, Pussylicker, Pussylips, Pussylover, Pussypounder, Putt Pirate, Pwt, Queef, Queer, Quickie, Rae Carruth, Rape, Rapist, Rear End, Rear Entry, Rearend, Rearentry, Rectum, Red Light, Redlight, Reefer, Rent A Fuck, Rentafuck, Retard, Retarded, Ribbed, Rim Job, Rimjob, Roach, Robber, S And M, S&M, Samckdaddy, Sandm, Satan, Schlong, Screw, Screw You, Screwyou, Scrotum, Semen, Sex, Sex Farm, Sex Hound, Sex House, Sex Kitten, Sex Pot, Sex Slave, Sex To Go, Sex Toy, Sex Toys, Sex Whore, Sexfarm, Sexhound, Sexhouse, Sexkitten, Sexpot, Sexsla Ve, Sextogo, Sextoy, Sextoys, Sexual, Sexwhore, Sexy, Sexy Biatch, Sexy Bitch, Sexy Moma, Sexy Slim, Sexymoma, Sexy-Slim, Shag, Shaggin, Shagging, Shawtypimp, Shit, Shit Dick, Shit Eater, Shit Face, Shit For Brains, Shit Fuck, Shit Fucker, Shit Happens, Shit Head, Shit Out Of Luck, Shit Stain, Shit4brains, Shitdick, Shitea Ter, Shitface, Shitforbrains, Shitfuck, Shitfucker, Shithapens, Shithappens, Shithead, Shitoutofluck, Shits, Shitstain, Shitter, Shitting, Shitty, Short Fuck, Shortfuck, Showtime, Six Six Six, Sixsixsix, Sixty 9, Sixty Nine, Sixty9, Sixtynine, Skank, Skank Bitch, Skank Fuck, Skank Whore, Skankbitch, Skankfuck, Skankwhore, Skanky Bitch, Skanky Whore, Skankybitch, Skankywhore, Skin Flute, Skinflute, Skum, Skum Bag, Skumbag, Slant, Slant Eye, Slanteye, Sla Ve, Slave Driver, Sla Vedriver, Sleeze Bag, Sleeze Ball, Sleezebag, Sleezeball, Slide It In, Slideitin, Slime, Slime Ball, Slime Bucket, Slimeball, Slimebucket, Slut, Slut Wear, Slut Whore, Sluts, Slutt, Slutting, Slutty, Slutwear, Slutwhore, Smack Daddy, Smack The Monkey, Smackthemonkey, Smagma, Smart Ass, Sna Tch, Snatch Patch, Snatchpatch, Sniper, Snot, Sodomite, Sodomy, Son Of A Bitch, Sonofabitch, Sonofbitch, Spank The Monkey, Spankthemonkey, Sperm, Sperm Bag, Sperm Hearder, Sperm Herder, Spermacide, Spermbag, Spermhearder, Spermherder, Spic, Spick, Spit, Spitter, Split Tail, Split Tial, Splittail, Stagg, Strap On, Strapon, Stringer, Strip Club, Stripclub, Stroke, Stroking, Stupid, Stupid Fuck, Stupid Fucker, Stupidfuck, Stupidfucker, Suck, Suck Dick, Suck Me, Suck My Ass, Suck My Dick, Suck My Tit, Suck Off, Suckdick, Sucker, Suckme, Suckmyass, Suckmydick, Suckmytit, Suckoff, Suicide, Swign Dixx, Swing Dixx, Swingin Dixx, Swinging Dicks, Syphilis, Tampon, Testicle, Testicles, Third Eye, Third Leg, Thirdeye, Thirdleg, Three Some, Threesome, Tit, Tit Bit Nipply, Tit Fuck, Tit Fucker, Tit Fuckin, Tit Job, Tit Licker, Tit Lover, Titbitnippl Y, Titfuck, Titfucker, Titfuckin, Titjob, Titlicker, Titlover, Tits, Titties, Titty, Tongethruster, Tongue, Tongue Thruster, Tongue Tramp, Tonguethrust, Tonguetramp, Toung Thruster, Tounge Baller, Tounge Thrust, Trailer Trash, Trailertrash, Tramp, Tri Sexual, Triple X, Triplex, Trisexual, Trojan, Trots, Tunnel Of Love, Tunneloflove, Turd, Two Bit Whore, Two On One, Twobitwhore, Unfuckable, Up The Ass, Up The Butt, Upskirt, Uptheass, Upthebutt, Urinate, Urine, Uterus, V Agina, V Aginal, Vd, Vibra Ter, Vibrator, Virgin, Virgin Breaker, Virginbreaker, Vulva, Waysted, Weenie, Wet Spot, Wetspot, Whacker, Whiskey Dick, Whiskeydick, Whisky Dick, Whiskydick, White Trash, Whitetrash, Whore, Whore Fucker, Whore House, Whorefucker, Whorehouse, Wigger, Willie Wanker, Williewanker, Wuutang, Xxx, Yellow Man, and Yellowman.
So, the 400 richest Americans have seen their taxes cut in half over the past decade. And Republicans would rather have the country in default than actually raise those taxes.
And, every time I hear about the
400 richest Americans, I wonder if those 400 are worried about this:
If I were one of those 400, this would keep me awake at night.
No, wait, don't...
Okay, so Anthony Weiner pulled out instead of standing firm. (heh heh heh) Maybe now we'll stop being obsessed over it. But here are a few things I still don't understand:
It's none of your goddamn businessfrom the start? (See #1 above.)
I really hate the Tea Party and their idiot Tea-Baggers. Oh sure, I hate their politics, which are monumentally stupid, as well as racist. (How can anyone claim to be
taxed enough already in an era of historically low taxes? Seriously? How fucking stupid are these people? And then the President lowered theirs even more. Why don't they love him? Oh yeah, he's black. And a secret Muslin [sic].)
But what really ticks me off is the same thing that ticks me off about the movie The Replacements. See, whenever I want to search the web for info about the last great band, I get a bunch of results for a mediocre movie mixed in. (I'm assuming it's mediocre. After all, it stars Keanu Reeves.)
The same thing with these moranic [sic] Tea Party folks. Interested in the real Boston Tea Party? Make sure you stick
Boston in the query.
Or maybe you're interested in actual tea parties, where people drink tea and nosh on nummies? Good luck. I hope your little girl wasn't searching for the info.
Even the word
tea gets corrupted. Google does fine. But every time I try to find local tea lovers through something like MeetUp, I get results for the local band of political idiots.
But the worst thing? Whenever I'm searching for photos of innocent scrotal suckling, I get bombarded with images of heavy-handed tea-bagger politics and parody. It's just not right!
This is an old post from an old site, in the wake of the original decision, one that has just been reversed.
I'm pleased as punch with the 9th US Circuit Court of Appeals' recent decision that the words "under God" in the Pledge of Allegiance violate the Constitution. It's plainly obvious that they do so, but our court system has always been scared to actually say so. While our poor excuse for a Supreme Court will certainly overturn this decision, it's good to know that there are at least two Federal judges left with some courage and integrity! Too bad Congress is full of cowards. Just because we haven't always had the strength of our convictions in the past, doesn't excuse that lack of strength today.
I'm painfully aware that most people disagree with me. But for the life of me, I don't understand why. I was trying to think of a way to explain what's wrong with the Pledge when I came up with this. Just replace the word "God" with the phrase "White Rule." This works for both the pledge:
"one nation, under White Rule, with liberty and justice for all"
As well as for the national motto, seen on currency among many other places:
"In White Rule We Trust"
The neat thing is that all the usual arguments for the inclusion of "God" still apply:
|Reasons to include "God"||Reasons to include "White Rule"|
|This is a Christian country and you had better just get used to it.||This is a white-ruled country and you had better just get used to it.|
|The majority of Americans are Christians.||The majority of Americans are white. |
(Still true as of the 1990 census.)
|It's not actually an endorsement of religion.||It's not actually an endorsement of racism.|
|It's merely an acknowledgment of our Christian heritage.||It's merely an acknowledgment of our white ruling heritage.|
|The founding fathers approved of the use of "God."||The founding fathers approved of white rule. |
(Quite explicitly, I might add.)
|We've always permitted the use of the term "God" before so we shouldn't stop now.||We've always permitted white rule before so we shouldn't stop now.|
|It doesn't specify a particular religion. |
(Well, it doesn't specify a particular monotheic religion
with a personified male deity.)
|It doesn't specify a particular white race. |
(It could be the Irish, or maybe the Norwegians.)
|Our nation's moral fiber has weakened ever since we took the concept of "God" out of our schools.||Our nation's moral fiber has weakened ever since we took the concept of "White Rule" out of our schools.|
|If you take "God" out of the pledge, next you'll be taking it off our currency. |
|If you take "White Rule" out of the pledge, next you'll be taking it off our currency. |
|Our founding fathers would be spinning in their graves if they knew we took "God" out of our government.||Our founding fathers would be spinning in their graves if they knew we took "White Rule" out of our government.|
If the arguments are the same and equally valid, then I guess it would be okay to include "White Rule" in both the Pledge and in the motto. Any of you Pledge supporters have a problem with that? Maybe now you're beginning to understand why the inclusion of "God" isn't a good thing in a society that has a diversity of citizens and claims to have freedom of religion.
The point here isn't to try to equate religion with racism. The point is that the Constitution provides protection against the government encouraging and endorsing both religion and racism. (Albeit through different mechanisms.) I think most people would agree that including "White Rule" in the Pledge and in the motto would violate the constitutional rights of non-white folks. However, if the arguments for the inclusion of "God" are valid, then they're also equally valid for "White Rule." The painfully obvious conclusion is that the arguments for inclusion are invalid and that the inclusion of "God" violates the Constitution.
Note that the issue here isn't whether religion is good or bad. The Constitution protects against government sponsorship of religion. The inclusion of "God" does constitute such sponsorship as surely as would the inclusion of "White Rule."
Frankly, I think the real problem here is that most Americans don't really believe in the First Amendment. Each of us tends to think that everyone one else should believe and act like they themselves do. I think that's a natural tendency, but one that we need to fight. The First Amendment is the cornerstone of our society. A diversity of beliefs and ideas is the very strength upon which this country was built. It's much more important than some shared religious view.
When it comes to porn, the court system is just fucked up.
The whole idea of community standards is just wrong. Why should someone's First Amendment rights ever be subject to the opinions of people who happen to be geographically close to them? It conflicts with the very idea of people having rights unassailable by the majority. It's nuts.
But, at least it's somewhat workable. If you don't like the community standards in one area, you can move to another. You shouldn't have to, but you can.
But now we have a mind-boggling stupid court decision regarding online porn.
Here's the deal: The court held that porn material online can be held to the community standard of any community in which they can be viewed. Let that sink in for a minute.
Yes, that means that you could produce a piece of porn in Los Angeles, put it online, and someone in Podunkville could watch it and then have you arrested for violating their local community standards.
Or, as one Slashdot comment put it:
So by that measure we should censor all pictures of women's faces as it violates the decency standards of Iran.
Now, let me be clear, Max Hardcore is a slime-ball asshole. If you get off on his movies, you have serious issues and you should see a shrink. Seriously.
But as long as the people making the movies and watching the movies are doing it of their own free will, it shouldn't be illegal.
But now, under this ruling, anything on the net is now subject to the standards of, say, Utah.
Oh, wait, Utah consumes the most porn, per capita, of any state in the union. Gee, I wonder why?
So, Sarah Palin managed to last one lone semester in college in Hawai'i. Why is that, other than her natural tendancy to quit things?
According to her own father, in this dual book review, it was because she was uncomfortable with all the minorities!
The irony, of course, is that white folks are a minority in Hawai'i. She wasn't uncomfortable with minories. She was uncomfortable being the minority.
Now she should know what black folks, or any other minority, deal with every fucking day. It could have been a valuable learning experience. But no, she goes to Idaho of all places to bask in her whiteness. Then she gains fame with us versus them talk. She's a Real American and everyone not like her isn't.
Well, fuck her and fuck each and every person dumb enough to think she's hot shit. You're half right. Ha ha ha!
(I got about one hour of sleep last night and I'm extra fucking cranky.)
The webs are alight with news that Obama won the Nobel Peace Prize. Most folks, even those on the left, are kinda wondering what he's done so far to deserve it. My favorite quotes today:
John's friend Ben:
Its interesting to note that the deadline for nominations was February 1, 2009. Its amazing what he accomplished in 11 days in office.
I originally thought he was being a dick. Just because the deadline is then doesn't mean that the selection criteria was limited to that timeframe. But then I did some research. In February and March, there's a committee that narrows down the 200 or so nominees to a short list. And, frankly, there's no way Obama did enough to justify being on the short list in that small a period of time. So his criticism was pretty spot-on.
My other favorite quote comes from PZ Myers, after pointing out that Obama hasn't really done a whole lot regarding ongoing wars:
Oh, well. It's definitely more appropriate than the award to Kissinger, but that isn't saying much.
The strange thing in all this is the concept of whether Obama
deserves the prize. It's strange because it betrays an assumption that there is a set of criteria by which we can judge candidates and determine their worthiness. There isn't. The only criteria is that a majority of folks on the Nobel Committee voted for a particular candidate. That's all. Anything beyond that is, well, your problem.
So, does Obama
deserve the prize? Well, he garnered a majority of the committee votes, so, by the criteria of the award itself, yes, he does deserve it.
If you're ever in Oslo, and you have some time to kill, you can check out the Nobel Peace Center. It's by the docks, next to the big-ass mall.
It's a neat place to visit, but I'll be honest, there are cooler things to see in Oslo.
A well regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the People to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed.
Where I think we lefties get this wrong is in claiming that the first half of the Amendment acts as a modifier for the second half. In other words, that the Amendment grants folks the right to carry guns only to the extent needed to provide a for the security of the country.
Unfortunately for us, that's not what it says. It sets up a condition to be addressed, then sets up a means to address said condition. It does not then follow that the means are constrained to the condition.
To help see this, let's remove the semantic issue from the loaded politics that surround it.
Let's pretend that we have a dumb-ass for a President who can't be trusted to eat a damn pretzel without potentially choking to death on it. (I know, seems like only yesterday, doesn't it.) To protect the President, we might have an Amendment that says:
A non-choking-to-death President being necessary to the functioning of the Executive Branch, the manufacture, sale, or transportation of pretzels within, the importation thereof into, or the exportation thereof from the United States and all territory subject to the jurisdiction thereof is hereby prohibited.
So, what does this mean? Does it mean that pretzels are banned to the extend necessary to prevent the President from choking on one? Maybe within a 100 mile radius of the guy?
No, it means the damn things are banned. Completely. (If you really hate the example, substitute cheeseburgers and think about Bill's cholesterol levels.)
If we divorce the semantics from the political issue, we see the real problem. The real problem is that the means used to address the condition are overly broad. How do you fix that problem? Well, luckily, there's a process for that. It's called
tough titties. We don't always get our way. That's how life is.
What we shouldn't be doing is claiming that the plain language of the Amendment says something that it doesn't. Why? Because then we're no better than the fools who apparently can't read and understand the Ninth Amendment.
So, after all of this, does mean that I'm pro-gun? No way! Defending the Second Amendment != Pro-Gun. For most of us, owning a gun is a stupid, stupid thing to do. But, what about our right to defend ourselves? Well, it's not about that at all. It's the simple fact that most of us would be too busy pissing ourselves to be able to pull the trigger.
I know, I know, you have these daydreams of being a hard muthafucker who can pop a cap without blinking. Guess what? I have them, too. They're daydreams. You aren't really gonna be able to do that kind of shit. It's hard to admit, especially for guys. If it makes it any easier, Bruce Willis and Kiefer Sutherland don't really go around beating up terrorists either. (A fact Scalia doesn't understand. Yes, that should scare you.)
What having a gun in your house means is that what are essentially property disputes immediately escalate to life-or-death situations. I own a lot of stuff. But none of it, not my MacBook, not my statue of Moon Knight, nothing, is worth me or my family getting hurt over. And, if I'm honest with myself, I know that in a gun wielding situation, even a half-assed criminal has it all over me.
Plus, of course, it's much more likely you'll kill one of your own family though accident or rage than ever take on a criminal.
Oh, I hear you say, but you're different. Probably not. Here's the deal: the US military expends loads of resources to turn men into people willing to kill when necessary. Why? Because that's what it takes to turn men into hard muthafuckers who can pop a cap without blinking. (Good thing, too.) Unless you've recently had the benefit of that training, that ain't you.
And if you have had that training? Then you can probably get some use out of a piece. Of course, you're also probably on your 5th tour of the Middle East because the country as a whole is unwilling to shoulder part of the burden we're asking you to carry. Which is another topic entirely.